CHAUVINIST:
Ah, welcome, gentlemen. I trust you are all men.
WOMAN:
Huh! Men, men, men.
CHAUVINIST:
Have a seat at this large table. We’re going to talk about some man stuff.
WOMAN:
Blah blah blah.
CHAUVINIST:
Tie a tie. We’re going to talk about this little Declaration.
WOMAN:
Ladies, where are you? Ladies, it’s time to stand up!
CHAUVINIST:
All men are created equal.
WOMAN:
But what about the women?
CHAUVINIST:
We think you’re too feeble.
WOMAN:
And that’s how the revolution began,
The French and the English acted like typical men.
And that inspired us women to fight.
Tell me why we can’t have the same rights.
What’s holding us down? Society’s rules?
I’m sick of these fools trying to tell me what to do.
CHAUVINIST:
Churn the butter; make the clothes.
WOMAN:
No! This is not the life that I chose.
CHAUVINIST:
Well, I say, “Your hand a needle better fits.”
WOMAN:
Well, I say your brain doesn’t even know a stitch.
I just read a book by Mary Wollstonecraft,
About oppression, it’s a lesson all people should have.
She spoke up like… “Who?” Elizabeth Stanton,
Who fought against slavery and got us all chanting.
We want rights for all people.
Women and men were created equal.
We won’t stop till we have a voice.
No discrimination. Women have a choice. (x2)
WOMAN:
I just got back from Seneca Falls,
And I got a little message for y’all.
See, we wrote our declaration.
CHAUVINIST:
Tell us your grievances.
WOMAN:
Here’s an explanation:
I’m tethered to the man, and I can’t own land,
Still can’t vote, now it’s gotten out of hand.
CHAUVINIST:
Well, that’s all part of our plan.
WOMAN:
What? Are you scared of women voting?
What, y’all can’t hang? I’m a suffragist!
CHAUVINIST:
I think I’ve heard enough of this.
WOMAN:
Susan B. Anthony and I are the roughest chicks.
In the NWSA, we got together, and we voted anyway.
They threw us in jail – like that’s a solution,
We need to amend the Constitution.
Now, finally, in 1920…
CHAUVINIST:
What?! You have the right to vote now, honey!
We want rights for all people.
Women and men were created equal.
We won’t stop till we have a voice.
No discrimination. Women have a choice. (x2)
CHAUVINIST:
So, let me get this straight.
Do women want to be treated the same as men?
WOMAN:
Of course, we do.
CHAUVINIST:
Let’s see what we can do.
WOMAN:
What it be – to my ladies overseas,
I wonder what it’s like in a communist regime.
CHAUVINIST:
Ironically, it’s not like what it might seem,
Men and women are living off the same means.
WOMAN:
But when American men go to war…
CHAUVINIST:
We need women like we never needed ’em before!
WOMAN:
There you go talking that to me,
Begging me to work… “Where?” In the factory.
And let me guess when you get back,
Can I hop into the kitchen and fix you a snack?
CHAUVINIST:
But it’s the second wave.
WOMAN:
From a bored housewife,
Thinking: “This can’t be all, this can’t be life, right?”
I think I’ll get a degree.
CHAUVINIST:
Well, your problem has no name… it’s weak.
WOMAN:
Well, y’all still get paid way more cheddar than me,
Maybe you should be the one who cleans the house all week.
We want rights for all people.
Women and men were created equal.
We won’t stop ’till we have a voice.
No discrimination. Women have a choice.
CHAUVINIST:
So everything was relaxed after the ’60s.
WOMAN:
Nah. Women still own only 1% of the land worldwide.
CHAUVINIST:
Oh yeah. And women aren’t even allowed to drive cars in Saudi Arabia.
WOMAN:
But there are female heads of state.
CHAUVINIST:
Yeah. Not in America, though.
WOMAN:
Not yet…
Flocab Spits Facts:
History Speaks